The Love Quiz

In thinking about the question of truly loving someone, I felt compelled to study the subject a little more.  A lot is said about love, and it is a well talked about subject.  So why, then, is it the hardest thing for us to live out and the characteristic less-likely used of Christians today?  I’ve heard that love is action and this is true.  However, like a dear Pastor friend of mine use to say, “You can serve without loving, but you cannot love without serving (Pastor Royal Blue)”.  Even though love is an action, there is much more woven into the character and nature of someone who truly loves that brings forth the loving action.  True love is solely based on and is empowered through the quality of the character of the person loving; not the recipient.  The actions of true love are described to us in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 and I will try to describe them and ask the pointed question rising out of the action.

I write these questions knowing full well that the proverbial finger I am pointing is stretched out from the same hand that has four other fingers pointing right back at me (Yes, even the thumb has been dislocated and twisted back in my direction).  I can only dream of passing this test; though I will die trying.

1. Love is patient – The word used for patient is “makrothumei” which speaks of patience with people.  It literally means long-tempered; slow to anger and mild in avenging while bearing the offenses and injuries of others.  Question:  Are you easily angered by this person or are you able to persevere through the offenses without being filled with resentment or revenge even though you have the right and power to avenge?
2. Love is kind – The word used for kind is “chrēsteuetai” which means easy, better, good, gracious or fit for use (useful).  The root word is “chraomi” and its definition means to make use of a thing.  This word for kind is an active word indicating to love in an active way.  Question:  Do you give totally of yourself to this person in an active useful way; even if this person could be considered an enemy?
3. Love does not envy – The word used for envy is “zēloi” which means to be heated, to burn with hatred or anger.  The root word is “zelos” and its definition describes the fierceness of indignation in a contentious rivalry.  This is not simply jealousy; it is much deeper and more intense.  Question:  Do you feel your temperature rise and your blood begin to boil at the good, gifts or talents of this person?
4. Love does not boast – The actual word used is “vaunteth” and the Greek equivalent is “perpereuetai” which means to act as a braggart.  This is the verbalizing of envy in attempt to breakdown another person; its envy spewing over.  This word is only used here in verse 4 and comes from the root word “perio” meaning “to pierce”.  Question:  In your communication to or about this person, do you feel the need to brag about yourself boosting your value over theirs and with the intent to break down or deflate their self-worth or value?
5. Love is not puffed up – The word used for puffed up is “phusioo” which means to inflate, blow up to be proud.   It is figuratively used for a person who is “swelled up” and an egotistical person who spews out arrogant thoughts that arise from our sin nature.  Question:  In respects to this person, is your attitude toward them an attitude of arrogance and conceit that comes from deep down inside? What are your true, deep-down thoughts of yourself in comparison to this person?
6. Love is not rude or unseemly – The word used here is “aschemoneo” which means deformed, indecent, without proper shape of form.  It can also mean to break loose the bond of a thing.  In a Biblical sense, it means that love does not break order; it keeps up and holds to the distinction God has set and acts decently in its own place.  Love acts decently at the right time, in the right place and towards all people.  Love would never say, “I don’t care what God has said about the matter, I am going to do it anyway.”  Question:  Have you ever not cared how your actions or words would affect this person or have you ever taken the “I don’t care how this affects you, I am going to do it anyway” attitude with this person?
7. Love does not insist on its own way – This is really “seek himself, herself, itself”.  To seek (zeteo) means to investigate in order to reach a binding resolution; to get to the bottom of a matter.  To seek in the context can also mean desire.  This is an intentional desire to bring about a binding resolution to a matter.  In other words, this desire is all about bringing to a resolution of praise, honor, profit and pleasure to yourself; not the other person.  The absence of this in your life is truly the key that unlocks your ability to truly love.  Question:  Do you neglect your own selfish desires, praise, honor, profit and pleasure for the sake of bringing to resolution the desires, praise, honor, profit and pleasure of this person?
8. Love is not easily provoked – The word used for provoked is “paroxoono” and is a compound word formed from “para” meaning “alongside”, and “oxys” meaning “a sharp edge”.  It literally means to cut alongside and is used to describe a jab in order to stimulate a feeling or emotion.  Not being easily provoked is confining your anger to proper limits and not to exceed a just measure in degree or duration.  Question:  Are you able to control your anger appropriately even though this person intentionally takes little jabs at you knowing full-well your “push buttons” and can you very easily drop any resentment towards this person in an effort to always be reconciled?
9. Love thinks no evil – The word for thinks is “logizomai” which means to charge with, to conclude, to think suppose or to take into account.  The word for evil is “kakon” and it means inwardly foul or rottenness that flows from a morally rotten character.  This characteristic of love is twofold.  First, love does not keep a record of wrongs done to it and second, love does not suspect evil without proof and is more likely to disbelieve the proof even when the proof points to guilt.  Question:  Do you keep a record of wrongs done to you by this person and do you jealously and suspiciously seek to uncover the rotten moral character of this person?
10. Love does not rejoice in iniquity – The word for rejoice is “chairo” which means to be well with or to thrive in.  The word for iniquity is “adikia” which means a condition of not being right with God and His holy standard of righteousness.  Question:  Do you grieve deeply over the sins of this person recognizing that they have a broken relationship with God and do you earnestly intercede on behalf of this person as if their sins and broken relationship was your own?
11. Love rejoices in the truth – The word for truth is “alétheia” which means not merely truth as spoken; truth of idea, reality, sincerity, truth in the moral sphere, divine truth revealed to man, straightforwardness.  Question:  Do you encourage, look for, find and praise the truth and sincerity of the nature and character of this person?
12. Love bears all things – The word for bears is “stegei” which means to cover closely so as to keep water out; to protect or keep by covering. This word is also used to describe a person who hides or conceals the errors and faults of others.  In all circumstances, love wants to protect and cover so closely that it acts as a shield and a guard against anything that threatens.  Question:  Is there anything that can pry you away, even in the slightest, from covering and protecting this person from anything and everything that might cause harm or threaten this person?
13. Love believes all things – The word for believe is “pisteuo” which means to think to be true; to be committed to one’s trust.  To believe all things in this context is to have faith in that the grace of God is sufficient in all things and He will bring all things to Himself.  Question:  No matter what the circumstances are, you commit all things concerning this person to God and you are forever placing this person in God’s trust.
14. Love hopes all things – The word for hope is “elpizei” which means an expectation of good.  This word is not like our word in that we use hope today as a guess.  We hope for the positive, but know there is a chance for the negative.  This word is simply an expectation that good will come with no thought of anything less.  Question:  No matter what the circumstances are and when belief begins to fade, do you expect only good of and from this person?
15.  Love endures all things – The word for endures is “upomenei” which means to take patiently; remain behind.  It literally means to abide under.  In this context, love patiently and courageously abides under the load or burden of others.  Question:  No matter what the circumstances are, do you patiently and courageously remain in the middle of the fight with unwavering resolve on behalf of this person?

Finally, this type of love never fails.  It will never fall powerless or have no effect under the most excruciating and devastating of circumstances.  The power of this type of love is exemplified in the person of Jesus Christ in that He loved us perfectly.  His love for us is an outpouring of His character and nature to undeserving unworthy sinners.  There is nothing about us, in us, from us or around us that causes His love to be extended to us.  His character and His nature was the only motivating factor that moved Him to redeem us and allow us into His presence.  That, my friend, is a love that is pure, a love that is true and a love that lays down its life for others.  Do you pass the quiz?